In our last blog we discussed taking the leap with the home heath care conversation. Now, let’s talk about how to begin that conversation. Everyone’s excuse is always the same, “now just isn’t a good time to bring it up”. Sound familiar? There is no time like the present to make sure your loved one is cared for.
If a loved one talks about how they hate bothering you, bring up how much easier it would be for them to have an aide stop by a few times a week. If they balk at the idea, bring up how they always say they feel as if they are ‘bothering’ you. Then add that having an aide will allow you two to spending quality time together.
While we are speaking of things that make older people afraid, their biggest fear – they’re forced to leave their home and move into a nursing home. If you know, the person is afraid of a forced move, bring it up and reassure them that in-home services help them stay there longer. In-home care is also more cost-effective than a nursing facility!
Having the conversation with your loved one about in-home care does not mean you’re controlling their life. Make sure they understand that at the end of the day, it’s their decision. Not yours. So, frame questions that help them make choices.
The best way to start this process is to learn about home and community-based programs.
A good time to have the talk is during the holidays, family reunions, get-together or special occasions. These are opportune times allowing for additional family members’ involvement, but not make your loved one feel bombarded all at once. You want your loved one to feel safe and secure during the conversation. The best place is at home, where they are most comfortable. If they enjoy walking, a park is another good location. You want them to know they are safe and this conversation is to benefit them and their future care.